17 episodes · Mar 6, 2002
In this series Stan convinces the boys to kidnap all the calves from a local farm after a look at how veal is made turns him vegetarian; Professor Chaos struggles to find an evil scheme that hasn't already been done on 'The Simpsons'; and when Bebe's breasts begin to take shape, the boys can't understand why they're suddenly interested in her.
E1The boys decide to fatten up Butters so that he can lose weight by eating at their favorite restaurant just like Jared, the sub sandwich guy. Jared, who is making an appearance in town reveals another secret to his weight loss, he has aides.
E2With their parents stuck in Time Share Hell, our boys are on their own on the slopes of Aspen, circa 1985. Stan gets challenged to a ski race and must win in order to save the youth center, get the girl, and free the trapped spirits of the Wakacha Vampire Indians. Not that he really cares.
E3The boys learn that disfigured people get prizes for appearing on a talk show and they sign Butters up. When the prize he gets can’t be shared, Cartman has his mother join him on a segment called, "Please Help My out of Control Child."
E4The boys learn where veal comes from and they decide to save the calves by hiding them in Stan’s room, where they all intend to stay until the calves are guaranteed their safety. During the siege Stan develops symptoms of an illness caused by his new vegan diet.
E5The boys have to sit through "The Russell Crowe Show" in order to see the premiere of the trailer for the new Terrance and Phillip movie. Meanwhile, Chef’s new TV has taken on a life of its own.
E6Butters isn’t working out and Cartman, Kyle and Stan decide to fire him and hold auditions for his replacement. Becoming an outcast, Butters becomes a super-villain with plans to cause chaos wherever he goes.
E7Professor Chaos returns with brand new, super evil, schemes to wreak havoc on South Park; unfortunately, the Simpsons have already done them all. Meanwhile, a super secret ingredient helps Cartman's "Sea People" evolve at an alarming rate.
E8Father Maxi is concerned with all the molestation claims that have been placed against the Catholic Church recently. After most of his parishioners turn to Atheism as an answer, he travels to the Vatican to get some answers.
E9The boys go out to see the new edition of Star Wars: Episode V and during the previews they find out that the movie studios are planning on re-releasing more movies with digitally enhanced effects. In an effort to stop this injustice, they go off to find Steven Spielberg and George Lucas.
E10After nearly five years and 89 episodes, it finally happens: Cartman gets kicked out of the gang. The reason? Bebe gets boobs and the boys go ape, threatening their friendships and society as we know it.
E11In an effort to protect their children from kidnappers, the parents of South Park hire the owner and operator of the local City Wok to build a Great Wall around the city. When crazy things like Kid trackers and Mongolions come into the picture. The parents learn a very important lesson themselves about trusting strangers.
E12Stan, Kyle, and Cartman win all the candy they can eat in a contest. There's just one problem, Kenny had the ticket. Now to get their prize, the boys have decided to build a ladder to Heaven in order to get the ticket back from their dead friend.
E13The boys are on a mission: return "The Lord of the Rings" to the Two Towers Video Store in Conifer. But this is no ordinary copy. Butters, the evil sixth graders, and the boys' parents all try to steal the ring, er tape, from the boys. Will they succeed?
E14A loveable new character, Mr Slave, makes his debut as Mr. Garrison desperately tries to get fired from his new job as the boys' 4th grade teacher. Meanwhile, the boys get sent to the Deathcamp of Intolerance for not tolerating Mr. Garrison's intolerable behavior.
E15When a famous psychic fails to help him exorcise Kenny from his body, Cartman takes other steps to achieve his goal. He and Chef travel to the moors of Scotland, where Chef's mom tries a little of her voodoo magic on him. Meanwhile, after the boys encounter with the TV psychic, Kyle is paralyzed with fear at the thought of members of the spirit world watching over him. Only by debunking those who claim they can communicate with the dead can Stan save Kyle.
E16When a 32 year old man claiming to be Stan from the future shows up in South Park, young Stan is forced to come to terms with the loser he will become. Meanwhile, South Park's own little entrepreneur, Eric Cartman is at the helm a new money making venture. Cartman is in the business of revenge.
E17In an effort to redeem himself days before Christmas, Cartman decides to bring Christmas to the Iraqis. So, along with Stan, Kyle, and Kenny they catch a ride with Mr. Hankey to the North Pole to bring Christmas to Iraq.